A N N A is my name!~~

Happy Birthday!~~

2008-12-29T23:48:00.000+08:00

Celebrated my birthday at Pasta De Waraku @ Central with CG.

They had this ladies 50% discount, so practically we went out of control while ordering the food. Haha

The best part? Our bill was loonng.. but total up to oni $80+, wheras the guyz bill was shorter, but it was a whooping total of $110+.

The benefits of being a lady~~ Isnt it nice?

Thank you, Carita for organising this birthday gathering.
It has been a long time since I celebrated my birthday with so many ppl.

Thank You

But stil, smtg was missing...
I miss Mandy...

Have you realised it?

2008-12-16T01:02:00.002+08:00

Have u realised it? I duno..
But I have...

We used to be close to each other, partying, shopping, gossiping, stationing ourselves at Pasir Ris Interchange and chilling with each other...

But things are different now.. I guess its coz we hv all grown up and our goals/aims are different now...

I used to be so close to you and Mandy but things are not the same anymore..
It is so difficult to get Mandy now whereas the only time I get to see you is when we go for service..

There is soo many things inside me which I need to find someone to talk to...

Too much stuff has happened to me and Im feeling very emotional..
I cry myself to sleep, wondering why did this have to happen..

I may looked to hv moved on with my life, but hv I reali moved on?
I dun even know that myself..

Im alway so afraid of how others will think of me tt sometimes the real me disappear..

Dec is supposed to be the month which I like best, with my birthday and Christmas..
But this year, Im feeling very down.. Isit the festive depression at work?

Harmful thoughts are coming to my mind..

God, I wan to leave this place, leave this hurtful place..
Bring me up to your kingdom...
I dun wan to stay here any more...

'I didn't even want you to get wet in the rain'

2008-12-11T00:01:00.004+08:00

Itz been a long time since I blogged....

Too much things has happened since my last entry...

I have been to the highest and the lowest point of my life in 2008...
2008 hasnt been reali very kind to me, neither have it been to others.. Esp Nov and Dec...

Lehman brothers, recession and cutting of jobs...
And the terrorism attack in Mumbai...

With the year coming to an end where ppl are waiting for their bonuses, we see news of companies cutting jobs.. And my fren was one of them...

Thank god I still have a job...

Few days again, I read abt the love story of Lo Hwei Yen and her husband in the papers...
Even as a stranger to them, I feel very heart-wrenching.
I can't imagine the pain and grief that her husband is going thru..
Compared to what he is going thru, mine is peanuts...

"I didn't even want you to get wet in the rain. I want to make your life as smooth as possible."
Sweet, ain't it?

I think it is..

HSM 3

2008-11-01T01:52:00.003+08:00

Watched HSM 3 today..

Good~~ Didnt expect i wld like it thou..

I like the soundtrack, "Right Here, Right Now"...

And I wan a tree house... Ha Ha

My thanks to my frens...

2008-10-08T01:19:00.009+08:00

I totally agree with the first point of Caring System #3,

Coz I had my contact within 48 hrs and shez Carita..

She reached out to me at the lowest point of my life - the transition period.

She showed me there is someone out there who will always love me no matter wat happens.

To me, Carita and Mandy are angels that God have sent to me to bless me.

9yrs of frienship is not easy to come by and I treasure my frenship with her and Mandy.

From young giggling school gals to young adults, we have seen how we matured over the years.

Thou we seldom meet up due to our busy schedules, but Im thankful to God for blessing me with such good frends who have been there when I needed them the most.

Thank you gals, for not giving up on me and cheers to our frienship!~~

Of course, to the new frens of CHC that had entered my life recently, thank you.

Thank you for the fun times that we have shared and I look forward to many fun times together!~~

2nd career for me? Hm...

2008-10-06T23:23:00.000+08:00

Was grumbling abt the movie industry shld give me some kinf of membership or rewards card
when suddenly my fren said I shld be a movie reviewer..

Can watch movies and earn money at the same time...

Ha Ha

Ttz a good one, but where to start from?

Never came across any "Recruiting for Movie Reviewers" in the Classifieds in my whole 12 yrs of reading newspapers... But I shall try harder coz I wan to work for passion and money at the same time...

Time at work today passed quite fast.. Hm.. maybe coz I was too busy?

Met Mandy after work for some catching up and bought stuff..
Yeah, I contributed to the economy again! Ha Ha =p

Legs ached like hell man!!~~

I wana do a foot massage soon!~~ Any gamers?

*Yawnz*
Time to sleep...

Itz shopping time!~~

2008-10-05T23:10:00.002+08:00

Reports are saying tt the economy is no good and ppl are affected but I dun think ttz true..
at least not for today...

Man, u shld see the crowds at Tampines today~~

Crowd, Crowded and Crowdest!~~

Everywhere is sale, sale, sale!~~
and the travel agency was damn packed!~~

And as usual, Ms Anna here contributed to the economy by buying wat else other den a pair of shoes?

Ha Ha

Oh, I got an Adidas bag also... A red red one... One as red as an ang bao..
Haha

Isetan is also as crowded with the bedroom sale...

Staff shouting, "bloster sale bloster sale"!! and ppl go "buy! buy! buy!" Haha

But I didnt buy any ok..

Coz I bought a pillow instead.. some egronomic pillow which is supposed to be good for yr neck...

Well... i think im gona hv a good sleep tonight!~~ =p

The Bunny~~~

2008-10-04T23:06:00.000+08:00

Went for svc den rushed down to PS to meet them for a show..

The Bunny...

Damn hiliarious man the show.. and kinda bimbotic also...

But I like~~

Coz I haven laugh like tt for a long time le...

A long awaited Gathering and a movie marathon!~~

2008-10-01T22:57:00.000+08:00

Met up with Aw and JH today...

Damn.. I miss them siaz...

Watched Vicky Cristina Barcelona, den had tea at Xing Wang..

Vicky is my 2nd show for today...

I had a movie marathon today..

Connected...
Vicky... and
Eagle Eye..

Shiok but sit till my butt pain esp at the Bugis theatres!!

Seriously, I think the movie industry in Singapore shld give me some kind of membership at the rate tt Im watching movies... Or at least invite me to the premieres so that I can @@ the stars...

Ha Ha

Man... I just love watching movies!~~

Now u know who to jio when u wan watch movie!~~

Ha Ha

Lessons learnt today...

2008-09-29T23:54:00.002+08:00

1) $10 can buy u lotsa and lotsa food in Ikea.

2) Taking half day leave is definitely worth it if u have the right company to spend it with.

3) I feel blessed with good frens, with frens who stand by me, frens who are a phone call away...

Ventured out of curiousity but what I feel now is totally different...

Thank you for giving me this feeling...

We are the ABC!~~

2008-09-27T23:38:00.002+08:00

Today, I received him into my life again...

I believe he will give me the love and warmth that I hunger for...
And he will walk thru this path with me..

I am thankful for the cirlce of frens that I hv...

And today, ABC was formed!~~

A visit from an old fren...

2008-09-24T23:01:00.002+08:00

Well... Nth much happen today...

Just that JH came back to play badminton with us, but instead of playing badminton with him, I went to play vball instead... Ha Ha

Playing vball hurts the hand man!~~
But the more the hurt, the better I feel!~~ Yes, I know I sound like a sadist.. haha

Looking at my hand now,I think I can see some redness and scars..

Stil sick as usual...
Duno when I will recover.. Haiz.. itz all coz of the trip to BKK..
Shopped in the rain when was in BKK coz it was raining..

Nth much today... Just getting kinda tired.. think itz due of the cough mixture...

Guess gona turn in soon... *yawnz*

A Pleasant Surprise!~~

2008-09-24T00:40:00.002+08:00

Heard a piece of news today which left me quite surprised and happy..

Keep smiling to myself... Hee Hee

I took the initiative and things are looking good...
Just wondering when the action will set in...

Plans of my year end trips are in the midst...

Im addicted to travelling!~~~

I think Im seeing the rainbow after the rain!~~ Ha Ha

My Best Frens~~

2008-09-24T00:32:00.002+08:00

I have 2 best frens, Mandy Yeo and Mandy Yeo.

No, Im not hallunciating, they are really Mandy Yeo and Mandy Yeo.

And I just love the 2 Ms Yeos coz they stood by me when I was down and they pulled me up when I fell...

To the 2 Ms Yeos, thank you and big hugz!~~

I LOVE YOU GALS~!~~~

Addiction~~

2008-09-14T23:39:00.002+08:00

Im addicted to travelling~~~
And perhaps shopping.... Ha Ha =p

Bangkok was AWESOME~~~
Am counting down to my next trip~~

My only regret was not enough money and a too SMALL luggage...

Shop shop shop, shop til I drop and go broke
Haha

Hm.. looks like I hv to live on bread and water for this month...

Anybody wan buy me meals?

Ha Ha

Warmth and love

2008-09-10T00:26:00.001+08:00

Went with him to his advanced graduation today...
Seeing him graduated left me wondering if shld I attend the same course...
Hm.. but kinda broke.. Haha

Had a long dinner with him...
Poured out my feelings to him as I cant take it anymore..
He held my hand tight...
I have never felt closer to him den to anyone of my frens, but at that moment, he is so close to me...

The hug tt he gave me... So full of warmth and love...

Oh, and I haven pack my bag for my trip later..
Haha

080908

2008-09-08T23:46:00.002+08:00

Duno why today so emo..

and I HATE myself for being so emo!~~

A mask is what I hv been putting on...
A full of smiles and a Im ok mask, but who knows how I feel inside?

Profile pictures on my facebook and friendster show me with a happy face which Im disgusted with... *pui*

"Dun think so much", "Dun cry" was wat ppl hv been telling me...
For all those who hv been thru wat Im gng thru now, Im sure when its all quiet at night, we will begin to think abt things and tears willl streak down unknowingly...

"Time will heal all things" is wat ppl tell me when I ask them how long will I take to heal, how long will it be before I revert back to the REALLY happy Anna inside and outside..

I duno.. All I hope for is I WAN TO REALLY HEAL VERY FAST..
And I know the best way for me to heal is by myself and not rely on others..

I dun wan to rely on my frens too much lest they find me annoying... Im always worrying, aint I?
Coz I can understand the feeling when a fren SMSes or calls u up too often...

It is reali thru the downs of yr life when u realise the POWER of friendship..

To my frens who hv been supporting me thru this phase of my life, THANK YOU.
Thou we seldom contact in the past due to our hectic schedules, thank you for appearing in my life again.

Pls continue to lend me your support for this while...

To you if you are reading this, thank you for the times that we hv shared together. It was just a matter of wrong timing.

Heartbreaks are painful and scarring..

My Batam Trip~~

2008-09-07T22:31:00.010+08:00

2nd Visit to Batam after so many donkey years...

Things reali changed alot from my first visit...

While touring ard Batam, I realised Batam reali has alot of spare land ..

If I were rich, I wld buy a land and develop it.. If.. Ha Ha

And Batm bike can carry many ppl~~

Look at the super gal~~

My biggest find in Batam!~~

The rootbeer float, waffle ice cream..God..I miss them...

Finally get to satisy my tastebuds~~

Haha~~

050908

2008-09-05T23:08:00.000+08:00

Time passed damn slow at work today...

Set my eyes on Onizuka Tiger.. Am gng to get a pair..

Cant stand the sight of Gloria nowadays...

Why are ppl getting more fake and bitcher nowdays?

Looking forward to my Batam trip~~

So long my fren~~

2008-09-04T23:20:00.001+08:00

Had a farewell dinner for Jack at AMK Jack's Place with Ong and YH..

Damn, that place is freaking ULU and FAR away from the MRT!!~

Finally, ORD loh my fren!~~ All the best to you and dun forget us~~~
Letz go for more KTV sessions yeah?

Bought a top today..

Just cant resist shopping~~

And I found out YH had a bag fetish just like me~~
And we are contemplating to sell our bags at Flea Markets...

Ha Ha

Tired, gng sleep liao...

Another chapter....

2008-09-02T23:55:00.002+08:00

A new haircut

A new beginning

Another chapter of my life has begin...

RSAF Open Hse 2008

2008-08-31T22:09:00.000+08:00

Went for my F50 JoyRide during the RSAF Open Hse 2008

Was scheduled for 0855 slot but boarded the plane at abt 10?
Cant reali remember le, all I remembered was yawning alot while waiting..
Coz I dun wake up tt early on a Sun...

I sleep till the sun shines on my arse.. =p

Walked ard for a while and went home liao coz was drizzling...

Hm.. it has never drizzle before during any RSAF OH..

Guess the weather is reali changing nowadays...

Crashed til 9pm den had my dinner... Damn tired lahz...
Ha Ha

But well, i didnt regret coz I had a ride~~
Ok, call me cheapskate or gian ben if u wan

I DUN CARE~~

A very accurate tarot reading..

2008-08-30T00:54:00.000+08:00

Was invited to Kitty's chalet..

Hang ard and had a tarot reading done by one of her frens...

The reading was super accurate and it got me thinking...

To soften myself was the advice...

290808

2008-08-30T00:52:00.001+08:00

Had dinner with Kitty and gang today..

Was introduced to new frens, frens from her AW, fun ppl~~~

Chilled at Starbucks and took the last bus home..

Nice but very tired...

Singapore Fireworks Festival 2008~~

2008-08-23T23:29:00.004+08:00

Went to catch the fireworks with Kenneth and Jack...

Wow.. it was ppl mountain ppl sea...

+ some drizzling...

The fireworks are nice~~

Am definitely coming back next yr again coz I LOVE fireworks and simply cant get enough of them... =)

I Think God Can Explain - Splender

2008-08-20T23:01:00.004+08:00

Its all right, Im ok
I think God can explain

I believe Im the same
I get carried away

Its alright, Im ok
I think God can explain

Im relieved, Im relaxed
I'll get over it yet

Conquer it did

2008-08-17T02:03:00.004+08:00

I came, I saw and I conquered...

More like it conquered me... Ha Ha

Today I finally gt a taste of online gaming
Man! I can totally understand why ppl gt addicted to it~~

Coz I was too~~
Played for 8hrs straight w/o getting my ass off the seat
Bathe and came back to play again til like abt 15 mins ago oni...
Ttz like a total of 14hrs!~~

But I like the feel of finding monsters to kill, killing them and achieve wat I need.. =)

Thanks for helping me to level up
if not I probably wld still be struggling my way up

Hm... looks like we have a common interest now... =)

HAPPY

2008-08-16T04:44:00.000+08:00

So happy today~~

Lalala~~~

140808

2008-08-15T00:28:00.002+08:00

Sick...
Down with the flu and cough *ahem ahem*

Met up with Mandy (yes, I hv 2 differnt frens named Mandy) for dinner at Ichiban at AMK Hub
The queue was mad~~

Sushi for dinner
followed by some walking ard..

Gng to watch 12 Lotus tml..
Hope I wun cry coz they say the movie is very touching... =s

Thou sick but Im very happy today~~
Coz smtg made my day~~

130808

2008-08-13T23:17:00.003+08:00

Went to the gym today, the feeling of sweating it all was damn good~~

Met up with Mandy today for dinner..
We haven met up with each other for quite while..
Thanks for meeting up with me babe~~
It was nice catching up with you...

As usual, login ard 10 to check my email..
Hm.. nth much.. decided to check out my facebook..
Haven been checking it out for quite some time...

And something on my profile changed...

Communication - A two way street

2008-08-12T21:09:00.006+08:00

Spoke to Jo today, feel much better...
Im gng to heed her advice..

Read yr blog.. ..
Itz the only way I can get an update of how u are feeling...

Saw something on your blog
Asked if you wan to share abt it, "no time", "nothing le", "nothing to tell" was yr answer...
I know u reali hv no time to share abt it with me coz of the deadlines u hv to meet...

"Nothing to tell" was the one tt pricked me the most..

I realised all this while, Im the one who have been telling you how I feel..
I haven heard much abt yr feelings and itz selfish of me...
I haven heard from you on your thoughts or feelings tt you are having/experiencing/gng thru there besides knowing tt you are stressed over sch work..

I wld reali like to hear from you...
Wld u care to tell me abt it?

As communication is a two-way street...

Thank you for sending me the Doraemon pics.
Thank you for taking the effort to look for the pics admist your busy schedule...
They have made my day~~

NEVER will be able to help

2008-08-11T23:06:00.006+08:00

Never... The word "Never" is a hurtful word..

You are stressed... Coz you cant get help from your resources and are afraid of wat others will think of you...

Im helpless... Coz I cant help you...
Never will be able to help you either...
*ouch* Im hurt...

Too sensitive is perhaps what you are gng to label me as...
Am I reali too sensitive or are u not sensitive enough?

Watever I say to you, will always be interpreted as giving you stress, even if Im just telling you my feelings...
Tt is why I dun tell u much stuff, but w/o telling u much stuff leads to us having a communication problem...
Tell me, wat shld I do?
I hv already tried my best...
And I think itz working...

Not calling you often. Checked.
Not MSNing you over trival stuff coz u are busy with sch work. Checked.
Not stressing you. Checked.
Which leaves me the option on just waiting online for you to talk to me when u are free or to say good night to me...

I know I cant help you with yr sch work...
Which leaves supporting you mentally, the only thing tt I can do...

Do you know when u are angry or stressed, the words u use can be pretty hurtful?
I hv been hurting ever since tt incident and am trying to heal..

I suggested good night calls to each other every day..
You said it will be very "siong" for you to call me, so u said tt I can always call you to say good night instead...

I hope u will remember what you hv said...
I dun wish for you to say tt Im pestering you or being irriating with the phone calls...
I dun wan us to quarrel over this in time to come...

All I wan is for us to talk to each other and keep the r/s going..
I dun mind being the proactive one coz I know u are maxed out with your studies..
Most importantly coz I love you and you are special to me...

A Phone Call...

2008-08-11T22:23:00.000+08:00

So happy to see u online this morning when I logged in...

Happy for you tt u hv Requirement 1 of your Coding assignment...

Gt 3 missed calls from you today...

Called you back..
Happy tt u called me when you needed a break to talk to someone amidst working on all your school work...
Itz been quite some time since you called me...

Thou it was a short call but Im contended with it le, my love...

2008-08-10T10:15:00.000+08:00

The classic romantic and unifying gesture.

090808

2008-08-09T23:48:00.000+08:00

090808..
Singapore's 43rd Birthday

It also marks our 7th Mth Ann'vy..
Things hasnt been easy for us for these 7 mths esp since u left...
We hv been having conflicts, misunderstandings and cries...
But Im glad we pulled thru~

Happy 7th Mth Anniversary!~~
Thank you for being my boyfriend and loving me...

THANK YOU!~~

2008-08-05T23:39:00.000+08:00

THANK YOU
A often forgotten but powerful word..

Thank you for choosing me...

Thank you for saying "I LOVE YOU" to me..
Itz what I hv been wanting to hear from you...

To my frens, thank you for listening to me and giving me advice
You guys hv been a good avenue for me...

I LOVE YOU

2008-08-04T23:10:00.000+08:00

I know you cant say the three words when you are out with yr frens, just like when Im in office...

Itz just tt itz been a long time since I last heard them from you..

I hv been trying to lengthen our conversations and I hope itz working...

Feel very happy when you wld SMS me to complain abt your sch stuff to me..

Thank you for letting me into your life in Aus...

2008-08-03T22:43:00.000+08:00

You hv made yr choice and Im glad that Im still the one..

But things between us arent the same anymore...

Communication... You said tt was missing from our r/s, I agree too...

Been making efforts to keep our conversation gng other den the usual stuff, but when u answer, "OK", "Nth lohz", "Normal"..
How do u expect me to lead on from there?
Yes, those were my usual answers to you when u asked me qns, but my answers hv now changed..

My life has been pretty screwed since..
Thought abt it for along time before I finally went to see a doc...
Referred me to a counsellor...

Longwithstanding low mood..
Having passive self harming thoughts..
Separation from you sparked off abandonment issues, impulsive outburts..

Are wat Im going thru..

I know things hasnt been easy for you, it hasnt been easy for me either...
Crying to sleep are what I hv been doin since then to now..

But Im still hanging on coz I love you..

A cover for my missing you~~

2008-08-02T23:48:00.000+08:00

Assignments and projects hv been coming your way and I know you are very busy~~

Didnt wan to disturb you but feeling so down at the same..

Decided to go out, to take in the fresh air and get my mind off things which has been happening recently...

Went to see the NDP Preview fireworks..

Fireworks... Beautiful but short-lived...
But still one of my favourites...

I still remember the first time we saw fireworks together, it was pre CNY at Chinatown..
It was a wonderful experience and a happy moment for me~~

I was happy that you called me twice and asked me what Im doin and who Im out with...
I was waiting for you to call me a third time to ask if Im home already anot..
But you didnt.. I was disappointed.. Coz I still remember when I went out with Liu He tt time, you wld specially wake up to call me to see if Im home anot...

I know your Pre-paid is running low..
Maybe Im just too sensitive...
But to me, these are the actions that show tt u care for yr loved ones, esp when ours is a LDR..

Devotion to the one u love...

2008-08-01T20:36:00.001+08:00

We had a long talk..

You didnt know wat to do, you were confused...

But hv u forgotten that yr main goal there is to study?

I hv nvr seen u cry like tt before..

And neither hv I, not even when the day u left..

Guess I reali broke down also..

Loneliness... is not only smtg you experience, itz also smtg I experience here..
Yes, I hv frends here but they hv their own lifes also, I cant expect them to always go out with me like you used to... Loneliness steps in..

Like.. A feeling which you cant control but a choice which you can choose to make..
Watz yr choice?

Call me old fashioned or watever~~
But I believe when you are in a r/s with your loved one, there is no room to even like someone coz your whole heart wld already hv been devoted to him..
My heart is devoted to you...

Hv u forgotten abt all those SMSes that u sent me?
Maybe u hv, but I hv not.. I reali believed it them.
Or was I too gulliable...

You dun hv to say u are sorry...

2008-07-31T23:30:00.002+08:00

The email was a shock...

Was expecting something positive instead...

Cried my heart out at home...

Responsibilty or love?

Loneliness or strong bond?

Me or her?

To be honest or to hurt me?

Isit reali communication or hv I not been treating you well?
Or perhaps Im not rich enough for you?

The ball is now in your court...

But I thank you for your honesty..

Coz honesty is important in a relationship...

Definition

2008-07-29T23:57:00.000+08:00

Crushes.. How do u define them?
Will they fade away or will they grow stronger with time?

Smtg tt you told me got me thinking..
Not abt insecurity but rather why did u chose to tell me abt it?

Was it honesty or are u preparing me for something?

Will love reali stand the test of time?